First, take three minutes to watch this short Vlogbrothers clip by John Green which is what piqued by thinking:
The reason this idea immediately jumped out at me is because, like John, I place an absolutely inordinate value on punctuality. If I have to be somewhere important at a certain time, chances are I will leave myself so much extra time that I actually arrive half an hour early. And then I'll need to find a place to hang out for 20 minutes so I don't look like a freak showing up way ahead of time (true story: every teaching interview I went on, I had to find a shopping center nearby to park and wait until an acceptable time to arrive). To this day, I'm always at school a half hour before my contract calls for; I just like to be on time so I don't have to worry, which in my mind equals "early."
My mind immediately goes to something one of my communications professors, Steve Koehn, used to say about his experience working in the movie industry: If you're five minutes early, you're on time; if you're on time, you're late; if you're five minutes late, you're fired.
I might like to attribute my obsession with punctuality to Steve's expectations of us in class, because it's the first time I can really remember it being verbalized. But if I think about it, it was probably a huge part of who I am long before that. I can remember in high school rushing to my locker after the final bell, panicked that I wouldn't be able to get my stuff and make it to the bus on time; there was no dawdling or talking with friends: I just had to get to the bus (and get this: my dad worked at the school. If I missed the bus it would've been no big deal at all!!).
John talked about how it's tied up with identity, your self-image and subsequent projection of your self as the kind of person who is punctual. I never really thought of it that way, but it makes sense. How much of it is really just pompous self-congratulations at your achievement or leering disdain at people who fail to meet your expectations (my friends.... ugh, they are never on time, it drives me crazy)? I am so proud of the fact that I'm punctual, and everyone who knows me knows it; ask Ms. Carroll sometime about what it was like to carpool with me to work!
I think the idea of it being part of your identity is because it feels like it's something you can *control* that makes you look good (at least in your own mind). Maybe it's a little bit about being a control freak. Having the type of personality who likes to evaluate the situation, consider possible circumstances, and attempt to exert control over the situation by making choices based on that reasoning, it's no wonder that timely arrival is something I value.
Our society does seem to send a lot of signals about timeliness being a moral equivalent of "good." Our schools run by a clock and bells with punishments for tardiness; professionals and tradesmen bill by the hour; the doors to Barnes and Noble get opened and locked at exactly the posted times. We don't even question the inherent values communicated through phrases like "The early bird gets the worm."
But what makes timeliness "good" other than the fact that our society, perhaps in its Puritan and Enlightenment roots, has deemed it such? (For some interesting reading, check out Benjamin Franklin's Autobiography, specifically the chapter where he outlines his 13 virtues and how he set about to methodically track his adherence to them. It says a lot about the same things we still value today.) Other cultures certainly don't place such a value on time as a resource... I mean, in Spain they shut down every day to take naps, can you imagine!! In our society, if you're late to something because you're napping, you're automatically discounted as lazy and unreliable.
But the final conclusion John came to in his video was essentially, "Does it really matter?" Will anything drastic happen if you're 86 minutes early to the airport instead of 90? John says that those of us who are such control freaks about time, end up doing so to our own detriment sometimes.
I agree with that, especially in the example he uses of yelling at his family. I can see how sometimes my obsessive desire to be punctual causes me anxiety. At the same time, however, I feel that taking extra steps to be early can alleviate my anxiety by relieving the pressure. So I'm not quite sure how I feel about the overall virtuosity, but I love how John ended his video with a reminder: ""Even when what you worship is good and noble, it doesn't always make you better or nobler" (3:02).
As for me, my focus on punctuality has really been tested in the past year or so. I see a therapist each week for issues related to anxiety. Before my first appointment she told me, "Now, I only have one parking space for clients, so I need everyone to arrive exactly on time so they get here after the previous client has left." Y'all, I had a serious anxiety attack over this. She was telling me I could arrive no more than 5 minutes early for my appointment. What if traffic on 22 backed up after I got on the road and made me late? What if I hit every green light and still arrived 10 minutes early? How could I possibly time it to arrive exactly on time?? What if I messed up? It seems like a little thing, but I had to learn to deal with so much anxiety until I convinced myself that it'd all really be okay if I showed up a minute or two late. I had to trust in google maps' prediction of 17 minutes, and force myself to leave school at exactly 3:41 so I would arrive at 3:58 for a 4:00 appointment. So far, I've only been late once and you know what happened? I said "Sorry, there was some construction just down the road" and she said... "No big deal."
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